the bachelor week four

Hello everyone week four is here! Let's begin.

No working out today! I guess we can’t expect him to do it all the time. Instead the episode opens with the girls gathered in the mansion while Chris chats with them and presents the first date card. It’s for Selma! It really doesn't take much at all to make these girls cry. And we see Tierra without makeup! I almost didn't recognize her. She’s being very quiet. How unlike her. 

Moving on...

Photo credit: ABC

Next stop: the bathroom. It's beautiful! We see Sean in his underwear. Wow nice! I don’t think it can get any better than this. He is being exploited so much. Poor guy. But that’s television. Gotta draw the people in somehow.

“I want to take it to the next level, and then the next level, and then have babies.” Selma says. Whoa, moving a little quick there? So three modes of transportation happen on this date: a limo, a freaking private jet with a red carpet and a jeep. By the way Sean... love those pink shorts! Selma asks him if he can handle all 110 lbs of her and O-M-G. I laughed. I weigh 110 lbs but I don’t go around broadcasting it to everyone. (oops, maybe I just did). She keeps asking where they're going. Sean says it's a surprise, so stop asking! And Selma, look at what you’re wearing. You’re not going salsa dancing. It’s obviously something athletic.

“It’s going to be such an amazing experience and I can’t wait.” Really Selma, is it really going to be amazing? “He took the Iraqi to the desert.” says Selma. Now that deserves my best quote of the day award! Hilarious! Ha.

Photo credit: ABC

Let’s see what happens.

Selma is so pissed. She doesn't do well in heat. Sean tells her they need to be on top of a 100 foot tall rock to get a better view of the desert and she asks if they are taking a helicopter up to it. Loved that. Selma, do you see a helicopter around? No.

Photo credit: ABC

“I’m gonna fall and die.” Way to be optimistic Selma! That's what the harness is for, so you don't fall and die. Silly girl. I don’t know why she is complaining so much. I’m not athletic at all and hate the humidity but I would love to go rock climbing. It’s on my list of things I want to accomplish before I die. Rock climbing, snowboarding, and travelling the world. Among others. She hates this date. But she ends up making it to the top and not dying. Congratulations.

Did he just say “your form looks unbelievable”? Really Sean? I bet you do like her “form” climbing up the rock in front of you. Any guy would love that view. Ha. We’re seeing all angles of Selma today. Boobs. Cuss much, Selma? You rocked it! Ha! This pun was totally unintentional. I love when that happens. Selma rocked that rock. I should win a best quote award for that one!

“Let’s go get cleaned up.” You’re in the desert! Where does one go to get cleaned up? Gonna squeeze some water out of a cactus? Ha. JK.

Evening part of the date? RV town. Having dinner in an RV. Now that’s classy! Actually scratch the dinner part. Drinking wine in an RV. Or by an RV.

Photo credit: ABC

This is the part where I get frustrated. They are lying under a blanket, her head is resting on his chest, her face is a mere 5 inches away from his, he’s touching her face and she’s giving him the kiss-me-now eyes. But then she tells him they can’t kiss. Come on! For real? He wants to kiss, she wants to kiss  but nope doesn't happen. It creates tension in me. I mean I understand where she is coming from about her culture being strict and her family not approving of kissing on national television but you can’t be snuggling up with him and looking at him like that and not kiss! Back away a little. It wouldn't be frustrating to watch if they were just sitting and talking, not cuddling. Whateverrrrr. (They most likely did kiss though, off camera. After a romantic moment like that, you would find time in private to kiss). Or maybe they didn't. What do I know?

Moving on. Let’s see if Tierra stirred up some drama back at the mansion…

The second date card arrives and it’s a group date. Roller derby. And Sarah’s on it. Because one-armed girls and roller derby go perfectly together. I don’t doubt she can do it but it’s just the fact that it makes things harder for her. What was Sean thinking when he included her on this date? I would really like to know what was going through his head.

Back to Sean and Selma and their no kissing frustration.

Aaarrrgggg! Just do it! Just once, a quick peck. Come on. So I’m at a point of yelling at my screen. Either kiss or back away. It’s driving me nuts. With all the intimate staring and twinkling eyes and telling each other you want to kiss. Just stop. Ugghh.  Whatever. They don’t kiss and she gets a rose. Their faces get even closer after she gets the rose. I’m looking away now. I just can’t take it anymore.

The next day…

Photo credit: ABC

It’s group date time! Wow Amanda, way to brag about how many group dates you've been on. Uncool. Soooo Roller derby. Looks violent. I would never try it. I would be the one falling and breaking bones. It’s not just roller skating, it’s girls pushing other girls while skating to get ahead. So there have to be some injuries. I would need all of the protection gear there is, including butt pads and a mouth guard if I were to participate in roller derby. I can’t roller skate but I can rollerblade. I just don’t like the two wheels in front and two in the back of the skates. In-line skating is so much easier! At least it is for me. Also I hate the frontal stopper on the skates! That’s where all my balance goes to crap and I fall on my face. Another reason why I prefer in-line skates, because of the rear stopper. Anyways, enough about me. Back to Sarah. She is having the time of her life. Poor girl. I felt so bad when she fell and started crying because she couldn't get up. Great idea Sean for taking her on this date.

I’m realizing as I watch this episode that when Amanda is acting normal, laughing and having fun she is actually sort of pretty and approachable. On the other hand when she is being rude, weird and giving death stares she comes off as this crazy, creepy girl. I like the normal happy Amanda. Without the crazy make-up.

So Amanda, who has done roller derby before (no, she hasn't) literally falls on her face and almost breaks her jaw. I bet that sucked! As she is holding her chin, Sean asks, “where does it hurt?” Thanks man I needed this giggle. Obviously her chin hurts since she is holding it. Unless she’s weird Amanda again and holds her chin for no reason. Ha. One thing about me that you have picked up from reading my blogs is that I’m very sarcastic. Sometimes my comments aren't mean but sometimes they really are and I’m sorry for that. But it’s all in good fun. So after Amanda goes to the ER, Sean decides to screw the derby and just have fun skating, which should have been the original plan. Sarah ended up being a trooper and skated with the rest of the girls. Good job girl!

Photo credit: ABC

Hey guys great idea! Let’s go back to the roof of the Roosevelt hotel. Because I've never been there before. (Sorry, more sarcasm). Just saying they go on roofs a lot. And Amanda’s back from the hospital! No broken jaw. She still has no fashion sense. I literally jumped out of my seat when Sean kissed Amanda’s chin. I did not see that coming. Okay never stick out your tongue and make that face every again, Amanda. It was disturbing to see.

Back at the mansion the girls are always just sitting around. Every time we see them that’s all they’re doing. How boring. Crank up some music and dance or something. Play a game. But anyway another date card arrives.  “Leslie H, could this be forever?” (nope.) She also gets a pair of diamond earrings that she gets to keep. That’s awesome.

Photo credit: ABC

Tierra "fusstrates" me. She is rude and threatens to leave the show. You want to leave Tierra? Freaking do it. We all having been waiting for you to leave! The house would be so much friendlier and drama-less. She has hit a new low. At least for now. I’m sure if she makes it through the rose ceremony tonight there will be worse stunts that she will pull. As Sean and Lindsay were heading to the hot tub, along comes Tierra to interrupt. Rude much? Geez. I would have been heated. For real. But I was shocked that he just left Lindsay standing there while talking to Tierra. I would be like “Tierra, F- off I’m busy”. Ha how would she have felt then? But seriously that was so wrong of her to barge in on them like that and sob nonsensely. That’s a word. Even if I just made it up. Poor Tierra, she is being tortured by the other girls who are doing absolutely nothing to her and she has to keep it all inside. Get over yourself, stop acting like you're in high school and start acting mature like the other girls. (I love using Tierra's phrases against her, have you noticed?) The other girls are feeling the same thing but we don’t see them doing the shit you do to get attention. Sean falls for her crap and gives her a rose. “I don’t want a sympathy rose” Tierra says. Ha that’s exactly what she got. In my opinion she shouldn't have gotten a rose at all! It should have been Lindsay’s. These are the girls' reactions as well as mine...

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Even as a pity rose, it still outraged me that he would give it to her. I think I screamed at my television the entire time. My neighbors probably heard me.  She is completely evil and the look she gives the camera after Sean leaves to get the rose proves this. 

Photo credit: ABC

Let’s take a look… 

Omg I cannot wait until Sean sends her home! 

This is happening. I don’t know when but it’s 

happening. "Manipulative bitch" is not his style. 

There are genuinely sweet girls in the house. 

The next day…

Holy Toledo is jealous of holy moly. I didn't count how many times Leslie said holy moly, but it’s a lot. Anyways.. Leslie H goes on her date with Sean. As they pull up (in a Porsche, or whatever it is) and park on Rodeo Dr, there are people in the background just standing around and staring after them. I love this! Their faces are hilarious. Oh, can’t forget the man taking a picture of them! Ha. Too funny.

Photo credit: ABC

The theme is Pretty Woman. Seriously? They go dress shopping. “I’m getting a gown, getting shoes, getting a purse,” (going home) “it’s a girls dream!” The dress she picked isn't cute. The first one she tried on was the prettiest. Pretty Woman  is a cute movie with a happy ending and I love both Richard Gere and Julia Roberts but it wouldn't be my dream to have a date based on that movie. But whatever. When she says, “I’m a tan Julia Roberts,” it cracked me up! No Leslie, you’re not. Next they have dinner. Look at that beautiful dinner that’s sitting in front of them. Delicious! Yet, they don’t touch it, not even the wine. Usually the food gets eaten off camera but on this particular date I don’t think it does. Unless they eat and refill their plates. 

Photo credit: ABC

He tells a story (pertaining to her), picks up the rose and says… he can’t give it to her. Whaaaat? Why would you pick up the rose, make her think she’s getting it, and then say no? That’s mean. Just plain mean. I kind of felt bad for her. She didn't see it coming. They didn't even finish their date and she got sent home. So here’s some jewelry, a dress and shoes. Tell me about your broken family. Now go home. That really, really sucks. It was especially sad when he picked up the rose and she got very excited. Aww. Bye Leslie. I liked her. Ben Taylor is singing a love song, but to who? The date ended… And this confused me.. Sean goes back upstairs to get the rose just so he can drop it from the second floor. Alright.. whatever floats his boat.

Sean says to all of the girls, “if you have questions come talk to me about it.” Or better yet, cry to him about it.  Maybe he’ll give you a rose. I’m sorry, was that crossing the line? I had to say it, I don’t approve of Tierra’s pre-ceremony rose. It really sucks that Sean doesn’t see her for who she really is. He doesn't see her evil side. Hopefully with time, everything will be revealed.

Moving toward a brighter atmosphere…

Robyn really makes me laugh, I love her! She is so cute. “Sean, do you like chocolate? Do you like the taste of chocolate? Do you want to taste the chocolate? Which chocolate do you want to taste?” Wow. Girl, oh my goodness. She asks him the same question three times. That’s awesome. Not at all surprising, considering her sense of humor, I expected her to say something like that at one point or another.

There’s Tierra, walking around flaunting her pity rose around. Ha. But nonetheless it’s still a rose and keeps her safe from elimination. Which blows. Lindsay’s face is awesome. And I find it funny that Tierra tries to find comfort in Amanda, the other nutcase. But I guess Amanda isn’t as bad as Tierra, she’s just weird at times with her attitude. Tierra actually schemes and is a manipulator. This proves my point when Tierra says, “I came here to win this.” Really? You only came to win the show? What about Sean? Do you even care about him at all or just the fame and the fact that you won? Sorry, homeboy don’t play that game. The sooner he figures this out, the better things will be.

Photo credit: ABC

Tierra is Tierrable! Bless Catherine for coming up with that. Ha. “I can read Tierra and I know that she has a good heart and I know that she’s here for the right reasons.” Sean says. No. False! So many wrong things said in one sentence. Right after this she says, “I’m keeping my eyes on the prize.” My point is made. Sean is not a prize to be possessed. But from his perspective I guess I can’t be too hard on him because he doesn't know any better. He only sees what she presents and not anything that the other girls see. Oh man when he watches the episodes and finds out she is a real two faced b-word, he will be shocked. Ryan Seacrest interviewed Sean on Friday and Sean does call Tierra evil. That was the best thing I've heard him say. He now knows Tierra’s true self. I feel like I’m talking about her too much.

Catherine is smart. She doesn't think telling on Tierra to Sean is a good idea. She’s not putting herself in the middle of Tierra’s crap like you were doing to yourself, Kacie. Maybe you would still be around if you were smart like Catherine. Maybe you wouldn't. There was no romantic connection with you and Sean anyway. Have you found a real job yet?

Photo credit: ABC

Catherine and Sean talk alone and she gives him a 
paper with her kiss on it. That’s adorable. I wouldn't 
want to kiss him in front of all the girls either. Like I 
said, girlfriend is a smart cookie. 

Photo credit: ABC

Rose ceremony time! Catherine gets the first rose. Des gets the next rose. Lindsay is next. Followed by Robyn, AshLee, Sarah, Jackie, and Daniella. Lesley, Selma and Tierra have pre-ceremony roses. Which means Amanda with her scary dark red lipstick, messy hair and weird dress is going home! Her style scared him off. Good Sean, now just eliminate Tierra next week and all should be right with the world. There’s no limo for Amanda, she has to walk home, all the way to Newport Beach. Have fun on your 13 hour walk home, maybe ponder what you did wrong. Or take a bus. You forgot your ugly wardrobe at the mansion. Now Sean is down to 11 ladies.

Omg the outtakes. Holy crap that is hilarious! Sean totally says my favorite cuss phrase. Loooved that. With him being so perfect I didn’t expect him to cuss. Ha. Also loved that Selma was the one to figure out what was wrong with the car. Leave it to the woman to solve things. What would men do without us? Include outtakes in every episode please!

Well that wraps up my recap of week 4. Can’t wait until week 5. Two episodes to watch and recap! Double the romance and double the drama. I’m excited! Bring it on! 

Until next time…

xo

All images are screenshots of the show taken by me (not taken from anywhere on the internet). However credit is still given to ABC for having the show available to watch online.